ImageThis isn’t me…yet!

2/26/2013

I just made my appointment for Saturday morning, to get my first Brazilian wax. Yes, I am a grown, 26 year old woman with an apartment who has the downstairs of a Virgin. It’s time to grow up.

For the record, I would like to say that I am not doing this for any man or for any sexual reasons. I have been single for 3 years and haven’t had a reason to do this yet! This is probably the most important step in my advocacy for self-preservation (my motto is: It’s maintenance from here on out).

To be continued…

Sorry I haven’t blogged in a while, but my creative well of juices was pretty much dried up.

It’s starting to flow again, and I have to put it down before it’s gone.

First of all, I want to state for the record that I HATE the word “Latina”. HATE IT. I don’t understand why it’s overused. Perhaps it’s a more marketable name for women that speak Spanish? Never the less I can’t stand it. Anyone who knows me knows this tidbit.

We are not Latin people. Latin people are people WHO SPEAK LATIN! Those people are long gone, because we have evolved into English, Spanish, Portuguese, French-speaking people!

In any case, this country is so shallow and dumb that they accept this. I honestly can’t stand it, and hopefully, one day, will start my own HISPANICA magazine rather than LATINA. I hate to compare it to the N-Word or having a magazine called Cracker, but that’s how I feel about it.

Moving on, being a Hispanic woman is probably one of the most beautiful and one of the most hardest things to be. We are women of every color! We are White, Black, Indian, Mulatto, EVERYTHING! And the most exciting part of it all, we speak Spanish fluently! I think I understand why other women (basically, that DON’T speak Spanish), can’t stand us. Other than the fact that we speak an extra language, we are pretty much the same.

Let’s begin:

Advantage #1 – We cater to the Spanish Market (duh!)

Let’s get this one out of the way. We are different colors but we cater to every Spanish market! No one knows this better than Shakira or any Bachata legend. These people spend their entire years touring the world because although their music is based on a small market, it resonates with ALL WALKS of Hispanic culture.

Unfortunately I couldn’t find an example of Hispanic women in music (feel free to chime in with any!)

But, two perfect examples of Ying and Yang is in Reggaeton, with Don Omar & Daddy Yankee:

Image Dark Puerto Rican

Image Light Skinned (or White) Puerto Rican

Both Kings in their leagues (Don Omar is the King in MY book ;) ) from the same Island, but totally different looks.

Advantage #2 – We Cater to the White Market!

This market is the hardest one to hit, but if you do it right you can hit it real good. Perfect example, Ms. Jennifer Lopez:

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Say what you want about this dumb ho, but she knows what she has to do to get the white girls to buy her tacky clothes. She abandoned her Spanish speaking routes (don’t think those routes were ever grounded in the first place) but she took her Hispanic “essence”, bottled it up, and laughed straight to the bank with it. We can learn a thing or to from this bitch.

But on a serious note, the two Hispanic women that have gotten the RESPECT of the White market the most are Zoe Saldaña and Eva Mendez:

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Zoe Saldaña has represented us well. She has hit every market from movies like Crossroads with Britney Spears, friggin Star Trek, and now she’s supposedly playing Nina Simone? I smell our first Hispanic Oscar Winner.

Advantage #3 – We cater to the Urban Market!

This has to be my favorite advantage because the urban market is truly, the most diverse market out there. It caters to everyone. And Hispanic women fit into it really nicely. There aren’t a lot of Hispanic musicians that have hit the Urban market (yet!) besides Pitbull, but I do love that Hispanic women are one of the most sought out Video Vixens ever. I am not saying that other women don’t have the same things. But because we are Hispanic women, and our backgrounds are basically every background known to man we have the entire package – boobs, butt, exotic looks.

I don’t care what you say, I love Erica Mena from L&HH. God bless her energy. It takes a lot to be that loud and opinionated, she does not make it look easy. What I like most about her is that she stands her ground.

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Being a Hispanic girl is NOT easy. It never will be. We have to stand on top of a mountain to be heard. But that’s for the next post.

What other ground-breaking Hispanics are there? What are you favorite? Did I miss anyone?

Let’s just cut to the chase. I was watching Good Day New York. And found these statistics unsurprising:

The Stats

1/3  of employees feel under appreciated by their boss

2/3 say they’d do a better job if they got along better with their bosses

This is costing America $360 Billion in lost productivity.

Better Boss or Raise?

65% Boss

35% Raise

Employees find their bosses “unpredictable” and are “feeling unappreciative”

5 Reasons to Tell Your Boss Go F*** Themselves (title of a book!)

- If you are miserable at work

- If the job is boring and tedious

- If your job is destroying your relationships with colleagues, family or friends.

- If you find the work to be senseless.

- If you do not find any sense of accomplishment in your work.

If you feel any of these, it’s time to leave.

It takes 22 months to rid oneself of a bad boss (almost 2 years!)

Solution – “Jolts of Joy”

go to the gym during lunch, go have lunch outside, listen to music, anything that has nothing to do with the boss!

-AN

My girl Nelta has done it again. This is definitely an album for her fans.

What I have always found so relatable about her is her corniness AND coolness at the same time.

All the songs stand out Uniquely. I am totally not a music critic. I suck at describing the “sounds” but let me just opine on each of the tracks (by the way she went with Darkchild and Salaam Remi this time which I almost peed in my pants for because this is a collabo that should have been done a long time ago!)

 

1) Spirit Indestructible – If it had been released last year with all the “Born This Way” themed songs, it would have been great and it would have beaten all the other trash “confidence” songs.

2) Big Hoops (The Bigger The Better) – Here, Nelta is in her truest form. With her DJ like lyrics, her references to 90s hip hop songs, and Darkchild beat, it’s perfection.

3) High Life – finally a song that’s not bitching about being rich and famous. She’s proud of her accomplishments, as we all should be. The High Life is relatable as well, especially if you came up from the bottom and are climbing your way to the top in your own life.

4) Parking Lot – huge banger, Nelly in her true form. She said that this album is referencing a lot of the Whoa Nelly! times, and let me tell you, this is what Whoa Nelly! could have been! But everything at its time.

5) Something – Nelly & Nas…a dream collabo of mines, come to life. Well done. Bring more!

6) Bucket List – beautiful, possibly one of the only radio friendly songs in the album. It’s about looking at your life and realizing your wasting time and not being in love.

7) The Most Beautiful Thing – a simple song about anything you find beautiful. Perfect song to add into the album, very Folklore-ish.

8) Waiting for Tonight – funny song, but I can see this playing in a restaurant while you eat.

9) & 10) Miracles and Circles – album fillers but solid songs to sing live if she wanted to.

11) Enemy – Simple song, but great melody and Remi’s production is his signature.

12) Believers (Arab Spring) I can totally see this used in a commercial of some type. I love it, I love the band she uses.

Bonus Songs:

Hold Up - Love love love, Very R&B-ish. Very late 90s.

Don’t Leave Me – the one genre Nelly never got to touch. Reggae! She kilt it.

I wanted to review this album because the radio has basically black listed her and her label has made no attempt at marketing it. I actually bumped into the album. But I hope word of mouth spreads because it’s solid and awesome. I do not believe she was trying to be like anyone but herself in this album, with the help of Darkchild who knows how to make anything sell.

-A

I have to air this out.

I’m an Independent. I don’t think I am going to vote this election.

But Obama is super annoying and althought he’s charasmatic and magical, he’s way into the celebrity of it all.

I like Mitt Romney, he tries. But unfortunately, he’s ignorantly out of touch, and his campaign team has screwed him over. I don’t know if it’s all on purpose for him to lose (because I do believe there’s a bigger plan) but if it isn’t, he’s wasted a lot of money and time.

Romney’s taped comments are not surprising. He was speaking to supporters that paid $50,000 to sit there, and he was just reiterating the beliefs of the conservative Republicans. This is what they all think. People using public assistance is a waste of life to them. His comments were not supposed to be heard by the general public. They were only meant for the ears of his supporters.

The liberals are having a FIELD DAY with this now. And I do not like Rush Limbaugh, but he’s right, this is not the time for all the Republicans to turn on Romney. I don’t get the cowarding. I’m truly shocked at how predictable everything has become in this election.

Whoever wins, the main focus is jobs. And I truly hope that whoever does win, focuses on that, rather than battling it out with the colleauges across the aisle.

It’s time we start working together. This is truly all a joke and it’s ridiculous.

Obama rubbing elbows with all these celebrities angers the hell out of me, and just because of his fakeness, I might just cast the ballot and give my vote to anyone but him. Out of pure spite.

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The Worst Attempt to Turn Batman into a News Story?.

Reblogged from Funk's House of Geekery:

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